How a Hillbilly survives a tsunami

When the tsunami warning happened, I was blissful in the land of medicated nod. When I awoke, our fan was running and our roommate’s TV was pretty loud. I could vaguely hear some type of unfamiliar whining sound.

“Is that a siren?” I wondered. But I dismissed that as silliness.

I checked my phone and my brother (in West Virginia), who is prone to going from zero to hero in an instant, had sent progressively more and more scared/doomsday/yougonnadie texts.

It went from: “Hey Sis, we’ve heard you have a tsunami going on out there. You need to get your medical supplies and find shelter.”

To: “This is your brother (Insert Name Here) and we love you. We know you’re out there on that island for only God knows why. YOU HAVE TO BELIEVE ME! STOP NAPPING AND GO FIND HIGHER ELEVATION! I AM SERIOUS!!!!!!! YOU GONNA DIE!!!!!” (Ok, maybe not the you gonna die part.)

I was left with more questions than I had answers:

  1. Why did he think I didn’t remember who he was? My nap wasn’t concussion induced. I was just sleepy.
  2. How the hell did he know I was napping?
  3. Why didn’t he call?
  4. How did I sleep through all of that phone ping sounds?

I replied that I remembered who he was and I was going to find out what was going on and what we needed to do. Then a couple of my friends from  O’ahu starting sending texts about finding higher elevation.

Then I knew we were screwed. I asked my roommate if we were in danger. And he pointed out that we’re by the water, so yeah. And he told me he was going to his baby mama’s house, so he was good. And I asked him what The Ant and I should do. He suggested going to the Mall. (Awesome?)

We started packing: clothes, some food stuffs, my Nook, laptop, a blankie, you know essentials. The Ant was complaining the entire time. Apparently, the potentially scariest storms of our sheltered life was interrupting study time. *sigh* (Could you drive me any crazier please, kthankx!)

This is what I felt like I was speeding away from–and no I don’t know why I felt like there was a surfer there. I also do NOT advocate for surfing during tsunamis.

I started driving (which was probably illegal, because of the meds that I’m on, but don’t worry, I hadn’t taken them in hours so I was just in a crap ton of pain). My first inclination was to go to the only bar that I’ve found that I like in Kaneohe. Unfortunately, there was on parking anywhere near there. So that was out.

I drove to the Mall, but the security followed us in their little golf carts and it freaked me out, so we motored out of there.  We drove up  Kahekili Highway and took a

It was probably more like this. I don’t know for sure. I didn’t look behind me.

right into the  Ko’olau shopping plaza.  I thought we could watch a movie and wait out the tsunami. (I know nothing about tsunamis obviously.) The place was closed. The McDonalds had lights on, so we were gonna haz cheezburgers, but they were closed too.

The Ant,”Why is the McDonalds closed?”

Me, “Because people needed to go home. Cuz there’s a tsunami warning. And they don’t make enough to ride or die for McD’s.”

The Ant, “That’s dumb.”

I’m pretty sure my eyes were audibly rolling at that point. I know I wishing for a cheezburger and a drink-preferably filled with vodka.

There were other people in the lot as well. We listened to the radio, stole some wifi and waited. And waited. And waited.  Fortunately, the tsunami was called off due to lack of tsunamiing. What did I learn? –Basically, we’re lucky as hell.

So how does a hillbilly survive a tsunami?

The Ant,”Run for the hills.”


Aloha, ya’ll!


Filed under Learning curve

9 Responses to How a Hillbilly survives a tsunami

  1. fridaysabtuYesterday Hawaii Tsunami scientists piroectidn blown, today Western Europe winter storms exposed. France President, Nicolas Sarkozy, declared national disaster.Please watch my video. It’s about Earth Changes, caused by continental drift.Continental Drift One huge supercontinent, became 2 continents, then 5 (or 6) continents, and then?Continental drift is an Earth’s nature cycles, extreme greenhouse gas emission makes climate change move

  2. Ha! I love how relaxed you sound as you are scurrying from certain death. I am one of the folks sharing the honor of being highlighted by Something Clever 2.0 yesterday. I look forward to reading more of your good stuff!
    The Next Step recently posted..For Better or For WorseMy Profile

    • T.A. Woods

      Thanks for reading! I’ve been going through and commenting, but I don’t think I’ve gotten through everyone’s. Moving has put me behind schedule. Now it’s time to put things in order and catching up on the internet. Jenn did a pretty nice write-up on Something Clever 2.0, didn’t she?

  3. I’m glad I’m not the only one with a sibling that has to announce who they are and their relation to me in their text – umm…DUH! I promise I kept my laughter to at bay until the end when I found out you didn’t die and were saved from imminent danger from the lazy tsunami…LOL
    Michelle recently posted..Guest Post – In my grandmother’s honorMy Profile

  4. Whew! You sure had me on the edge of my seat. I kept scrolling up to look at the date and searching my memory bank for “when”. Glad you didn’t have to go through the real thing. Nothing worse than having to be coherent thru meds. I was flying out of Oahu one time and I took something as we were boarding the plane, perfect time to put myself out. Well it turned out to be one of those flights were something was wrong with the plane. We sat on it for close to two hours, they let us get off and move around. Then we had to get back on, get our stuff and go to another plane. All I wanted to do was lay down in a corner and fall asleep. When we finally got settled I could NOT go to sleep but I was still drug. Awful feeling. ~TALU

    • T.A. Woods

      Kenya, believe me at the time, it was one of the scariest things in life. I had no experience with a tsunami. In West Virginia we have blizzards! What do I know about tsunamis? I still only know what I’ve read and what people have told me–though I’m not really itching for any first-hand knowledge.

      Being medicated, or under-medicated whichever the case may be, and having to be involved in more than just napping is horrible. I’m so glad that part of life has ended!

  5. I can’t even imagine what I would do if we had a tsunami alert here. It was bad enough to go through all of the fear and terror attached to the hurricane that we had last Fall in NYC. A lot of people really didn’t take it seriously and I think that was a big part of the problem with regards to loss of life. After what we went through here, I will definitely be taking all warnings about natural disasters very seriously. #TALU

    P.S. I would love to connect on FB if we haven’t already. You can find me at
    Tough Cookie Mommy recently posted..Ringling Bros. And Barnum & Bailey® Presents Built To AMAZE!My Profile

    • T.A. Woods

      Hey Maria, the hurricane must’ve been so very frightening. I’m glad that you made it through. I know a lot of places are still trying to rebuild. I hope your area has been able to build back up.

      I’m really grateful that I was able to laugh and joke about this later. We were fortunate that it was essentially a non-event. But we weren’t the only people who were moving to higher ground, and going to emergency shelters just in case. I’ll definitely find you on fb.

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